I don’t even..

So I decided to go ahead and try a test for depression online. 

The first one I took gave me the answer

You have: SEVERE DEPRESSION. Consult a doctor as soon as possible. 

Now, I’m pretty sure I don’t suffer from ANYTHING ‘severely’, so I took another. 

Moderate to Severe Depression: this can be very serious. It is advisable that you speak to a professional. 

Still incredulous, I took 11 more online tests, including one that took half an hour to do 101 questions.

The mildest response I got was ‘Mild to Moderate Depression’. 

All the tests consisted of statements for which you had to select a frequency or strength of agreement.

The weirdest and for me, the most profound, was that about 70 percent of the statements were so true to me that, on reading them in my head, I found myself breaking down into tears on the spot. 

I am genuinely worried about the possibility of depression but I don’t want to face it. 

I’d tell someone but I know they’d immediately dismiss it, find a reason as to why there’s no way it is depression that I seem to be suffering from.

What do I do? 

4 weeks ago  /  0 notes

This isn’t meant to be read, I just don’t own a diary.

Right.

Um.. I don’t even know where to begin, really. This is literally my first post in maybe over a year.

I just didn’t know where else to go, in all honesty.

FYI, if you don’t want to read some mopey teenager’s thoughts and problems, look away right this second.

Because before I go any further, I just wanted to say, PEOPLE ARE SHIT.

I have literally lost my faith in humanity, in these past few months. I won’t go into detail so as not to name names, but I feel like my trust and friendship with certain people has been punched, kicked, trampled on, shot in the head, and buried at the back of the garden under a tree. 

Am I just really easy to trample on? Am I just a massive pushover? Apparently so.

I am so sick and tired of being pushed around, but the problem is, there’s sod-all I can do about it. Why?

Because the people who betray me are those who I thought were my friends.

Even my best friend has screwed me over, well and truly. And you know something else? I have to pretend like nothing’s wrong, for their sake. Because that’s what friends do.

The worst part is, every time I feel like things are looking up, some other piece of crap comes and rapes me in the ass knocks me down. I CAN’T GET AWAY FROM IT. There is no one I can talk to about this, and I feel so isolated and lonely.

And so, in desperation, my old tumblr blog has become a temporary make-believe diary.

Let the fun begin.

(rant over.)

1 month ago  /  0 notes

Remember Aqua from the Cheetah Girls?

be-your-teenage-dream-tonight:

itspimpin-pimpin:

sorryladiesbieberismine:

Reblog and click the picture.

WTFFFFFFFFFFFF

i wanna see

OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD.

I don’t geddit O.O

(via laughnow-playlater)

10 months ago  /  125,153 notes  /  Source: youremy0nelove